Are you four years old? Forty-four years old? Do you like to talk about poop? Come on, admit it. Poop is a little bit funny isn’t it?
Two years ago we went on vacation to Jamaica. My son, who was two at the time, had just learned how to use the toilet three weeks before we left the country. In Jamaica, we stayed in the Port Antonio area, which is not a major tourist destination. The people are charming but the town and everything in it – sidewalks, streets and buildings – are slowly crumbling to the ground. Needless to say, there are no public restrooms. The only part of town in good condition is a short stretch of tree-lined boulevard along a new marina built a few years back. So, of course, that is where I found myself propping Charlie up while he pooped behind a bougainvillea while my husband was off buying fried chicken for lunch and a trio of Jamaicans sitting under a nearby gazebo in the rain pretended not to notice. Our predicament was already barely tolerable and then, thirty school children in uniforms rounded the corner, spotted us and shrieked with laughter, “No, no mama! You can’t let your baby poop there!” Yet, somehow, we survived the mortal embarrassment, and like any good parent or pet owner would, I grabbed a plastic bag, scooped the poop, and threw it away in nearby garbage can. Admit it now, you’re laughing, aren’t you?
As the popular children’s book tells us, everybody poops. Cows, do it. People do it. Dogs do it too. They say that Eskimo people have fifty words for snow. Meanwhile, we Americans have fifty words for poop. Did you know that paleontologists even have a word for fossilized dinosaur dung? It’s called coprolite; look for some in your local museum.
The problem with poop is that it is often a vector for bacteria and diseases. We have made huge advances in human health, simply by building wastewater treatment plants and septic systems to keep human excrement out of our rivers and streams. Similarly, large farms treat their animal manure to protect groundwater and surface water from contamination. What about the other sources of poop in our lives?
According to DoodyCalls, a pet waste removal service, the 84 million dogs in the U.S. create 22.9 trillion pounds of waste every year, enough to fill 286,344 tractor trailers to the brim. Larger dogs obviously create more waste than smaller dogs, but none-the-less, an average sized dog could easily generate 275 pounds of poop in one year! Unfortunately, dog poop can carry a whole host of bacteria and parasites, including heartworm, whipworms, hookworms, roundworms, tapeworms, parvovirus, giardia, salmonella and e.coli. Dog poop also contains phosphorus and nitrogen (human feces does as well), which can be a problem for local lakes and rivers when it washes into storm sewers and waterways, contributing to harmful algae blooms. In some parts of the country, cities have actually had to close beaches near dog parks and “dog-heavy” areas after rainstorms due to water pollution from poop.
Picking up your dog’s poop while you’re out walking around the neighborhood and even in your own backyard is one of the easiest ways you can help to protect local lakes and streams from water pollution. Get in the habit of bringing plastic bags with you when you leave for a walk, and make a sweep of your own yard a couple of times a week. You might feel embarrassed at first, but not as much as you would if an angry neighbor opens his door and yells at you for leaving dog poop in his yard. If you need inspiration, just picture me hiding behind a bush in Jamaica while a gaggle of school children points and laughs. You’ll survive the embarrassment. Just pick it up and be on your way.
East Metro Water 